Quarantine vibes


written 2020-04-08 01:42:11

Hi welcome to Seasun's. Ok, so we've all been pretty much taking safety measures. I'm stuck at home. All the time. Sure I go out to walk some days. But it's the same block and the same neighborhood.

Everything is blending together. When's lunch? I don't know. I go sit in front of my laptop on the dining table and hit play on the lecture recording or join the lecture live stream. I blankly stare and occasionally write a note or two, and then say "cool," and hop off the moment it's done.

Compare that to when I actually went outside, drove to a separate location, and became immersed in a place with other people of the same goals and purposes (i.e. getting an education)—a place dedicated to teaching and learning. My brain switches gears. I don't just sit and listen; I sit and think. I ponder. I wonder. I connect whatever the lecturer is talking about to other things I've wondered about, to something another class I have/had discussed before, or to something I've seen or can see happening in my/others' lives. Things like that.

Now I just watch, glass-eyed, at the screen in front of me. Unsure if I'm absorbing or understanding what I'm hearing or if I just think I do.

All but one of my lectures are live. Hell, even that one live one has pre-recorded lectures posted as another option already. What is a schedule? I don't need to rush to a scheduled class anymore. I can put it off, off, off, however long I please. "It's recorded, I can view it whenever," is a hot thought I'm holding with mittens and carefully putting away every single time it sneaks up on me.

People asking questions that make things more intersting or lead to the professor going on a tangent about an important issue in their field or the world is gone. Discussions where people can see different perspectives and experiences and added more wordly and recent information is gone. Professors asking the class questions and then working to help us come up with the answer ourselves by giving more hints based on our attempts are gone.

I don't even bother to try to understand everything a professor says anymore because sometimes her mic is way too loud, it stabs my ears. And then other times, at the same volume, she sounds so quiet I don't hear a thing.

Tl;dr online classes is a clusterfuck. Shit sucks.